The first time it wasn't a rape.
There was time to look at the woman on the bed,
to memorize the sun on the wall,
to stammer goodbye.
Not to have done what hindsight thinks
would have been good and right, noble,
was part of the ache.
The second time was not a surprize,
but still there was a blindness
ripped away at the moment of death.
Sudden knowledge came at the moment it was too late--
Knowing that one never leaves, but only seals away,
for a little while, the truth.
The third time came like a rape
But brought the ultimate peace.
I am called to stand in the truth forever now:
In the doorway of death and life,
To never seal away but to still live--
Human.
I am fully human.